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135 - making the moth't of things - part 2
I was off work yesterday with a cold, so the comic is up late and
unfinished. But if you check back later it will probably, by the magic
of the internet, have been replaced by the finished version.
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3.12.05 14:19
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136 - Hey! It's the 'I spent all weekend in bed watching TV' filler strip!
Yes, I have spent most of the weekend
under my duvet coughing and producing improbable quantities of snot. I
thought I'd had a full recovery on saturday just in time for London
Loves, but went into sudden relapse on sunday morning and have been
clinging on to life by a thread ever since.
T-shirt update: the meat shirts have now all been shipped, but a few
people who ordered small sizes will have to wait longer because my
distributor messed up. But for those few (I think it's only 3 of you)
my distributor will be sending a free copy of the 'imagination' shirt
to make up for it. And speaking of the imagination shirt: they don't do
orange ladies shirts, so the ladies ones will be in 'frost pink'
whatever colour that is. Guys shirts will still be in orange. How does
that sound?
(this is frost pink according to google)
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5.12.05 12:55
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I was going to post this yesterday but I was TOO BUSY. This SHOULD NOT be allowed.
Well, I'm back at work (not without a fight though - I came in an hour late just to make it clear that I am still ill, and I am doing them a favour by coming in) and my desk is strewn with the accoutrements of illness: cough medicine, aspirin, strepsils, orange squash and hot chocolate (I'm sure those last two have been the most instrumental in my recovery).
However monday was spent in that magical grey area between 'not well enough to go into work' and 'not ill enough to not enjoy being tucked up under the duvet watching daytime tv'. My flat mates were all at work so I spent the day loafing around the house in my pyjamas, dressing gown and big furry slippers. It was bliss.
But there was still one wriggling fly of duty still lurking in my self indulgent ointment: I had a birthday card to post, and since it was already several days late I really couldn't wait for a full recovery to post it. The letter box is just 10 metres from my front door, but I was very comfortable in my loafing suit and was disinclined to change out of it just for the purpose of a 1 minute foray into the outside world. There was of course one solution that would resolve both problems at once, but it was a solution that would mean breaking one of society's most fundamental taboos, possibly setting back the progress of civilization by hundreds of years. It took a minute for me to steel myself, mentally battling against many years of heavily ingrained social programming, but before long I stood there, on the boundary between being an accepted member of society and being a hated outcast; facing the abyss. On the doorstep. In my dressing gown.
And then I stepped over the edge...
As I walked down the path in my slippers, tighting my dressing gown belt against the cold I felt a chill of fear - I'd forgotten how busy our street got as people walked home from the tube station, and I'd picked the time when everyone had just finished work so there was a constant flow of people past my gate. But I would not be stopped now. I had chosen my course and I would stick to it. I flung the gate open and defiantly turned to face the postbox. It was at this point that I realised just how far 10 metres is when you are standing on the wet pavement in your pyjamas; I think that was when I broke into what I would like to think was a 'casual jog' but what was probably more like a 'desperate sprint'.
Up until now I had been travelling in the same direction as all the commuters so I didn't have to look anyone in the face, but once I'd popped my letter in the slot and turned to make the journey back to the safety of my flat I realised I would have to walk against the flow, passing by about 10 fully dressed professionals with little more than a baggy hong-kong-phooey t-shirt to protect my dignity. I doubted that any of them would really consider me a 'number one super guy'.
At this point I have to admit my resolve sputtered out. What had begun as a noble quest transformed into a walk of shame. I think there is no better way to describe it that to say that I 'slunk' back to my front door, not even daring to look the passers-by in the face as I went. Once through the gate I dashed up the path and back into the protective warmth of my home, where the wearing of dressing gowns is not only accepted, but positively encouraged.
The adventure had not been without it's problems, but I think I emerged from it a better man. I had thumbed my nose at society's preconceptions, the letter was posted and I was still in my comfy loafing suit with no more harm done than a wet leaf down the back of my slipper. I was victorious: In your face society!
Next time I'm wearing the fez too.
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7.12.05 10:43
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Dear Santa,
I have decided that these are very cool:  It glows in the dark.
And you can draw on it.
I do not know why, but me and my felt pens desire it. However it's 20 quid and I just know I'd mess it up as soon as I touched it with anything that marks permanently, so I would never dare to buy one for myself. But if you're reading this santa, I'm sure I've been a very good boy...
P.S It looks like the meat shirts have all been sent out, and it would be really cool if the people who got one could be brave and maybe send me a picture that I could put on the website. Hopefully it will make people realise just how cool these shirts are and it will encourage them to buy the next one for fear of being left out!
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7.12.05 16:26
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138 - Hamburger Hijinks - part 1
 For
those that are interested in such things, this is a story that I
originally wrote for a comic strip in my student newspaper in 1998. I am secretly
hoping that someone will contact me and accuse me of stealing the
story, and then I will be able to smugly point out that it can't really be considered stealing since I was the
one who originally wrote it.
Idiot. I think this is unlikely to happen. I have
booked my table for the UK Webcomix Thing
in March next year, and I am already a little excited. Ok, I'm not
really, but I am vaguely pleased with the description I wrote of myself
on the exhibitors
page which is more or less the same thing. I have somewhat
unwisely claimed that I am going to have a book ready to sell in time
for the event; let us hope that this is not my undoing. EDIT: Oh! The imagination shirts have gone on preorder! BUY BUY BUY! If last time is anything to go by the shirts will be available to preorder until mid January and will arrive some time in february. I know it's a long way off, but think how cool you will look in february! Woo!  (boys shirts are in inspirational orange, and girls are in fanciful frost pink. The colours!) |
12.12.05 10:30
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Crap
 Yeah, we used to share a place together, remember? You'd jump in the air and shout, and I'd make scratching noises and hide under the wardrobe. Good times. Well I thought I'd drop by and say hi and see how you were doing. Nice new place you have here, mind if I run across the floor in plain sight a couple o' times just to freak you out? Then I think I'll scamper around behind your desk for a bit and you can try to figure out if you'd be able to trap me under a pint glass. It'll be just like old times.
Oh no, don't put all the junk on your floor onto the bed on my account, I'm quite happy to lurk here underneath your computer just watching you for a bit. Hi! Ok, I've got to go and disappear behind the wardrobe again now, so you can wonder if I've gone away for good or if I'm just waiting for the right moment to come back. See you later!
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14.12.05 10:55
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